Sunday: 01.April.2007

Spring fever: birds, bees & human hormones

Birds & bees, busy at work in springIs spring fever real? Do the birds and bees really represent an emphasis on springtime mating for *all* God's creatures?

The past few weeks, at the local coffee shop, my rock-climbing buddy (Tom, see entries dated 27 & 28 October) has been making comments such as, "Wow! Look at that girl who just walked in," and "Ooh, check out the one in the red dress."

I've never seen him act like that before. It's rather entertaining to see him so 'interested'. Every girl looks hot to him.

Yesterday, a girl walked in wearing white pants. "If there's *one* thing," Tom said, "that really gets me going, it's a girl with white pants and a black thong underneath."

At the counter stood such a girl. (I had to turn and stare in order to see the black thong.)

Tom proceeded to explain, between sips of java, how, while a young lad, he had a "magical" experience with a girl wearing white pants and a black thong.

"It's not the girl," I argued, "that's got you so fired up, but rather the classical conditioning from what happened many years ago."

"If a 90-year-old granny walked in," I continued, "wearing white pants and a black thong, weighing two, two-fifty, you'd *still* get fired up .. cuz you've been conditioned to respond that way .. like Pavlov's dog." =)

••• today's entry continues here •••

I have a theory (which you'll probably never hear anywhere else) about children (like myself) conceived during the months of spring (typically April/May, but it depends on where you live).

It's that .. parents who have kids (especially the first one) born in Dec-Jan (maybe February, depending where you live of course, and assuming a standard 9-month pregnancy) .. are not as compatible as those whose children are born during other months of the year.

During the (feverish) month's of spring (my theory postualtes), mother nature takes control, by cranking up the reproductive hormones. Compatibility becomes secondary.

I could be wrong, but if you conduct your own private polls, and ask your friends, "How compatible would you say your parents are?" .. I'll bet you'll find my theory rings true .. with their date of birth. [The bug was born in January.]

I've even found myself, lately, these past few weeks, flirting with girls, without even trying. It's like I'm on auto-pilot. And the girls, too, have become bold, aggressive.

Here in SoCal, spring is in full swing. If you live in one of the more northern latitudes, it may take another few weeks for the "fever" to reach you. Proceed with caution.

For more along these lines, here's a Google searchpre-configured for the query > birds bees spring romance mating sex hormones flirting





Posted by Rad at April 1, 2007 08:21 AM

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